I had a tia and emergency surgery I wanted to go back to work on admin only but not to be I am going through so many emotions from anger hurt sadness I know it’s right for me to leave I did well in the beginning nothing wrong with me but as time goes on it’s little things like forgetting things terrible fatigue at times sometimes I think that’s emotional adapting to medication everyone contacts you to start then the texts gradually fall away my eyesight has slightly got worse but no big deal the worse thing is people say gosh you look so well which is not bad but you don’t always feel great but things will get better I am learning a language on Duolingo for free it just keeps your brain going little puzzles and try to read though sometimes I am not taking things in it’s little things that we take for granted but we will get there if it’s sunny and you can go for a walk and say good morning along the way
Your experience sounds quite alot like mine.when people keep saying how well you look and I’ve even had people say are you sure you’ve had a stroke as if I’m lying it can be very hard.I stopped telling people if I was struggling and having hard time because I felt they thought I was lying ,but that just made me emotionally much worse.Then when I had outbursts of anger and rage I was told I was acting like a lunatic.I haven’t had any councelling or anything yet,just been engaging on here and did couple of Bobbi’s zoom meeting and I’m starting to feel less stress and anxiety ,just knowing other people have been through it and you’re not going mad has been a revelation to me .Also you’re right if you can keep doing little things not just for your recovery but things that make you happy just like little walk in the sunshine you will start to get better. Take care of you jul
Hi Justin. So sorry to learn about your stroke and subsequent problems. I truly hope you can get some help to deal with your mental issues. Having had a stroke nearly a year ago, I understand how it affects you mentally and physically. I have had some psychological help re stroke and I think it does help to talk things through. Although I think I’m 95% back to normal physically, the thought of having another stroke is always with me. I try to make the most of things and carry on. I hope you can do the same. Find a hobby you enjoy and make new friends. I’m a member of an art club and,fortunately, can still participate in crown green bowls. The banter definitely helps. Sending all my best wishes. Cynthia
Justin have been wondering if you are feeling a little bit better step by step this group is supportive and it’s good you had a zoom chat getting help and little by little you won’t always feel this bad I have such a good memory but the other day I had a shower and felt really irritable as I couldn’t find my trousers when I looked I had already laid them out on the bed 
this bothered me in the beginning but I am trying to laugh about it now we are all here for you and each other
I’m doing ok at mo,joined a study I found on here to do with emotions after stroke with some Oxford professor,start that tomorrow got my councelling starting beginning of next week too.So I’m keeping busy which helps me as if I’m sitting doing nothing that’s when my mind plays with me.yes I have found this place really helpful and it’s giving me some perspective.thank you for thinking of me,it really helps knowing there’s people who do care
We all care on here because we can identify with it all I was doing so well I thought that’s it then I soon realised it’s a marathon not a sprint and it’s finding out what help you can get and where to start the study sounds interesting
I understand that completely,I thought I was winning, nearly back to me because physically I was getting stronger,I walked five miles and didn’t collapse.I couldn’t do that before the stroke, then my head started to unravel because I didn’t have this intense need to concentrate on my body anymore and I started to notice that in my mind I was still struggling.I wouldn’t engage with anyone I hated going into a shop to buy a drink,as an ex publican I always felt at home in a pub but now I’d ask my friend to go to the bar for me ,I didn’t have any confidence in myself anymore.I started speaking to people less and less untill I finally fell apart.But through some small miracle I found here to have a rant ,and I’m not silly I know this is a nice place and very helpful but not a miracle cure ,but it inspired me to start talking to people again,and I’m so thankful for that.Im on a teams meeting today with the study so I’ll let you know more about it afterwards take care jul and thanks for caring
Exactly like people say it’s a marathon not a sprint I get fatigue then sometimes I go down and can’t be bothered then have to pick myself back up I know it will get better and for you
I too had a stroke 2 years ago. I was on my own at the time and I think that helped to motivate me regards physical improvement but you are so right it is the mental impact that is perhaps the hardest. Use this group in whatever way helps you. I haven’t posted often but just reading other posts has helped me realise that I am not alone in this. Talk to your go, face to face if you can. Take whatever help he offers. I have used both counselling and anti depressants and they have both helped me though I know they don’t work for everyone.
I am now in a much better place and have joined a local walking group. Meeting others has been almost as hard as seeking help but has been well worth the effort.
Keep taking a day at a time and aiming for small improvements
thank you and yes we will get there and it’s easier together
Thank you and so pleased to hear you’re doing well.I am finally asking for help and am prepared to accept it too( which has always been a problem for me even pre stroke)Fingers crossed I can start to move forward instead of sideways or backwards at last
Hi everyone,bit of non stroke related advice needed.Ive been spending alot of time with a woman who I’ve become friends with,I’m still in love with my ex,but there’s no chance of that ever happening as she’s found a younger fully fit replacement I shouldn’t take it any farther with this new lady should I?Just because I’m lonely is no excuse to lead someone else on is it.Please I’d like any point of views to help me. I already know the answer just need it reinforced as I’m weak and lonely
@Justin what a dilemma. I guess you should be honest with the lady - you may have already done that. Good friends is perhaps an option for now & then see how it goes. Honesty is always the best policy in my opinion.
Yea ,I knew that ,but as I said bit of reinforcement was needed.Ill just keep the cold showers going and stay friends😂it’s nice to be able to ask others opinion so thank you
Yea it’s easy to know what’s right and ignore it because it’s better for yourself, I don’t want to do that.Maybe pre stroke I would have just thought about me but one of the few upsides to stroke(damn it:joy: )is I now have more empathy for others
Hi my name is Kimberely and I am previous stroke our situation
I ‘date’ here and there for a ride to get out. I am honest about it and pay for dinner. I am in no position to find a significant other at this point. I am too tired to give it the attention it deserves and it is unfair to ask someone to take on the responsibilities I can not yet handle. Perhaps in the future, but certainly not yet. Even though they know the truth up front, on occasion, one will get pushy with the be my girlfriend stuff. They don’t really understand what that entails and they don’t know me well enough to be in love as they claim. Maybe they believe in love at first sight, i don’t. When that happens, they have to go.
I want to be ready,but I’m not.Its right what you say,so have decided that I’m just gonna stay friends with her.Its gonna be a little awkward as we had little kiss and cuddle but we’re both grown ups and get on well so fingers crossed it’ll be something we laugh about.Not only am I still in love with my ex,but my head isn’t in good enough shape to deal with starting a new relationship yet.Still don’t feel I’ve got enough to offer,but I’ll get there😁
Its whole lot of work trying to Recover
Thank you all for your help with this spoke to her this morning told her I thought we should just be friends and to my surprise she was really good with it,I been stressing for days cos I didn’t want to lose her as a friend but it seems I needn’t have worried.This being a grown up is not as hard as I thought😂