Fatigue returns

Well well welll.  5 years and 10 months post stroke and I had forgotten what post stroke fatigue felt like. Yes I get some tiredness, but nothing like the first two years.
 

Yesterday I was busy. Catching up on all those outstanding chores. Booking car for service, arranging to get hair cut. Raking up fallen apples. Picking best apples from tree and wrapping them to store. Ordering a new marble stone for the memorial zone, phoning friend to see how her husband is progressing in hospital, finishing home accounts.

yes routine but busy. Much more busy than usual.

then crash. My balance failed, a modest headache descended , I felt sick, the post stroke fatigue returned. The feeling is beyond my writing ability to describe.

Part of me is pleased to be able to recall what it's like. But most of me is devastated. Surely I am not transporting back to pre pandemic times. The hopelessness, the helplessness. The lurking distress that I do not wish to live.

my word, no wonder no one understands how it feels. I can't even describe it.

there are about a hundred things going on. I had forgotten all this.No paralysis. no aphasia. But emotionality is back. 

I slept well. My cat knows all is not right, he is sitting nearby. My wife returns today from a short stay with family.

what is it I tell everyone. Smile (that really is working). Be positive (not sure I can do that today) you are not alone (yes  I am).

 


 

 

 

Sorry to hear you're not feeling too good today. It sounds like you had a busy day yesterday and you know how the SF seems to come from nowhere and hits us when we least expect it to. Its just because you have overdone it but yes it's horrible. As for the emotionality I know how terrible it can be. Maybe rest up for a couple of days and  it will pass. It's good that your wife is back today she'll help you get over this.

Keep on smiling and everything else will fall into place. I'll be thinking of you. 

We are going away for the first time since the stroke and I've got so many lists of things to take. I've got lists about the lists I've already made it's ridiculous but that's what stroke does to you.

Take care Colin

Ann

So sorry to hear that Colin, you are such a great support to all us on this site, and I really feel for you. Just never know when it is going to hit do you? Anyway, like you say, keep smiling, know that,s difficult at the moment, but am thinking of you. Take care, Jane.

Ah Colin, what an unwelcome surprise. Cats often sense when all is not well, mine does, she comes and sits next to me. Monitor your symptoms, what you've described must have set off some anxiety too, I imagine. Rest up, and let us know how you are going, keep smiling.

Dear Ann 

thank you for your kind words.

going away...what a lovely bonus.

My wife is on the buses from the station. I can't collect her because I haven't got full vision. Nothing to do with stroke, I am in between the two cataract operations.

I saw her train rush past the bottom of our garden, on its way to Clacton on the sunshine line.

I am a bit non plused by this relapse. Never saw this coming. I had forgotten just how awful things were for the two or three years after stroke.

yes I had a busy day, but it was one day when I sorted out many things and had no problems. So why the relapse.

I will gather my wits and try again.

colin

Thank you Rups

 

Thank you Jane. It is weird being the other side of this little fence.

colin

Sorry to hear that you feel under the weather. I have just read your post of two days ago and hope that you are feeling better today. You always seem so cheerful and in control and encourage everyone. I love reading about your cat. He must be a great comfort to you. I am a dog person and derive much comfort from my son's dog. Hope to hear that you are now recovered. Regards Lilian

Dear Lilian

 

thank you, much improved. I was shocked to find the post stroke fatigue had returned. I didn't think that was likely. I had forgotten just how utterly awful things were a few years ago. I wrote down how I was feeling and I could never recall that. Maybe it will be helpful when a newcomer is suffering.

sooty did hang around me, but maybe that was because I was feeding him. Rose and I share that pleasure, but she was away, so Sooty wanted to make sure his only source of food was keeping him in biscuits plus meals. He has taken up residence in our unheated conservatory. Very convenient for us as he can have access to the garden or access to the house. He is coming indoors more as the weather deteriorates.

he seems very good at opting to be indoors when rain or wind is expected.
if he stays in, then come the morning he will trot into our bedroom to ask to be let out or fed. That's so nice.

I appreciate how a dog can be good company, although I would never swap a cat for a dog. Sooty may well outlive me.

I adore my cat. He isn't pretty, but I adore him. His fur is thick and smooth like satin. 

best of all, this rotten period of my life is notable for our cat finding us and less notable for stroke, heart surgery and current cataract surgery.

best wishes

Colin


 

 

Colin, I'm sure you will return to your old self. It sounds to me as if you have simply done too much. I find that if ai try too much, which I do sometimes, then 'wham' I am both stressed and exhausted. My best days are those where I pace myself, but sometimes 'the old me' tries take over and it just doesn't work. Keep smiling!

Thank you John. It is reassuring that I am not the only one to relapse.

i am surprised that, as you succinctly said, wham the SF was back.

I am now rapidly improving. 
 

best wishes

colin

Dear Colin. I am glad you are feeling better. Your cat sounds lovely. Our dog,Ludo is equally good company. He too loves biscuits and is very obedient when food is around. I have had both my eyes done with cataracts. The results are spectacular, well worth the operation. My son had heart problems in Thailand last year, it was a nightmare trying to repatriate him at the beginning of the pandemic! Things work out in the end, no matter how bad they seem at present. I will keep you in my prayers. Best wishes Lilian 

Thank you Lilian

cataract removal on right eye has gone perfectly, well nigh on. Then I have to wait for left eye, which is Monday week. In the meantime I can't see much at all as the eyes seem to fight each other. Then another six week wait until next stage which is checking and reassessing. Then I can have glasses to fix , probably just for reading. So it's going to be late December if all goes to plan.

went to church this morning and you had a prayer from me. The service was too long, so you got extra curriculum prayers from me,

colin

Dear Colin. Thank you for your reply and especially your prayers. I am always grateful for them . I constantly ask for help and guidance for myself and others. Today has been a good day for me, including an excursion on my electric powered wheelchair. I managed not to crash. Yesterday I unfortunately reversed over my poor husband's foot!! Luckily no damage was done to him. He is very  understanding! I am sure that your sight problems will soon be resolved but I will remember you in my prayers, Best wishes Lilian 

I just read all that you did on that day.   I would have felt sick, exhausted and fatigued by all that before I had my stroke!!  You sound like a Type A personality.   I'm one, too, so I can see the signs.   Easy up on yourself.  Take a while to recharge, and do better pacing of yourself in the future.  (I need to tell myself that all the time--pre stroke and post stroke)  Take caresmiley Jeanne

Dear Jeanne

i have always been blessed with good fitness. No strength, but good stamina and fitness. I have a strong heart. So a stroke followed by aortic stenosis just doesn't sit well.

before stroke I would dig our garden, decorate the house and so on.

six mile hike used to be easy.

so it is a shock to find I can't do much. 
 

what surprised me is that I did several things that I had put off for some time and they all went well. Exactly the scenario I would expect to relax about.

yes, you are spot on, I should pace myself. I already do so little, but I guess I must do even less.

I don't want a repeat of the SF return.

best wishes

Colin

 

 

 

I  had a TIA  3 years ago  Luckily  recovered well  but  yesterday  out of the blue  whilst doing Aqua in the pool  came  over dizzy  felt  sick  and this lasted  over a minute  Went  home and slept the afternoon  Now  OK  but a shock to the  system  I  think you always have to take that  extra bit of care because there has been a major change  to our system 

5 years on after a haemorrahagic stroke and 5years of abject tiredness. A different locum, agreed during a tel consultation with my wife present that this wasn't right. He referred me to a sleep clinic and 6 weeks later diagnosed with sleep apnea (51 episodes in an hour so pretty  bad ) supplied a CPAPS machine on the NHS, and episodes went down to 8 per hour within a week, so over the last  3 months it's been a lot better (I'm awaiting DVLA response as I've had to tell them legally, whether they'll revoke my driving licence or not) BUT, in the last 2 weeks the tiredness has returned and I've had  a headache something I've not had for 5 years (were a daily occurrence pre stroke) , BP is fine and under control so I'm going to give it a week and if it's not improved, or gets worse I'll be speaking to the sleep clinic. In summary I've had it, dealt with it and now it may be back, 

Hi all!  My stroke was almost 30 years ago, but still yawn more than I used to, and close my eyes most days for ten minutes or so.  Feel re-charged afterward somehow! 

I had my stroke in 2009 and even after all this time I can only work in short bursts then i need to rest, for example I am fatigued after a shower ! walking round the supermarket is a nightmare. I feel so lazy needing to rest every 15 mins or so. I am often mentally fatigued (after writing this I will need a break). After all this time it has not noticeably got any better