I wish I had seen this post earlier! Hello, Steve and Simon. I always learn something when there is talk of photography. A pre-stroke interest of mine.
Like you, Steve, I have had no real hobbies since stroke with the exception of swimming when I am able to get to a pool, but even that has been more about my recovery than pure enjoyment these days.
One of my strokes was right thalamic (hemorrhagic). I was unaware of the sleep issue. I have sleep issues but after 2.5 years they finally seem to be a little more normal now.
I suffered a concussion very many years back and my sleep reminded me of that. I just couldn’t…at all. I was awake 5 days straight, until the doctor gave me Amitriptolene (however you spell it). I was excitable and agitated for about 2 weeks, rarely sleeping, even with the help. I suppose I thought of my sleep until lately as kind of the same thing, so I learned something from you.
I used to have many hobbies, none of which are very important to me anymore. I don’t really miss them much.
Somewhere along the line recently, I remembered that just like pre-stroke, I decide who I am, and I decide what interests me, what I believe, what I want to do or be in this world. And that made me stop missing old me. It isn’t like I was overly content with her, either…I just was familiar with her. There were no real surprises because I knew how she would react. She was dependable/reliable in a way I was comfortable with more than content with.
Now I am completely free to be a new me. Mostly without preconceived notions of who that is. I know I was way faster before, but I actually have more time now, so why must I be fast? I no longer work, and I am no longer truly responsible for feeding, clothing, housing others, so there are really no expectations I have to live up to. That is wonderfully free-ing.
Perhaps I am the lucky one, after all. How many people get this opportunity?