Dating ,after a Stroke

Hi , I’m new to this forum and am looking for bit of advice really , it’s a bit of a strange one , 

I’m 48 and had a stroke last year I’m doing really well , however as a single lady looking to get back out there to start dating it’s tough to explain to any potential new dates any advice as I’m struggling , I fear I’ll be single forever , lol no problem really as I do love cats , but in all seriousness any help or advice I would be very grateful. Xx

 

 

Dear C

Unless you have had a stroke you do not know, not even have a clue, as to what we go through. So there is a temptation to keep quiet about the stroke that got you. If you do meet up with a partner then they must accept you for yourself as you are now, not how you were before stroke. I am assuming you had a full stroke. If by chance you had a transient stroke then ignore all this.

So just go for it as the new C. 

I never had pets. Then a cat adopted me. I now love that cat intensly. He treats me as I am now. He accepts me stroke and all. My wife also adores him. He has been a major part of our post stroke lives. I am very restricted with travel, so I am always here for my cat. I am a new person, the old persion has gone. It is hard. But we were given life when many do not survive.

Best wishes

Colin 

Hi! I hope you are doing well. I know what you mean. I have not even told all of my friends and acquaintances yet as I needed to deal with their reactions and questions in stages.  Some people have been fantastic. Stroke is more common than I realized and many had experienced it through relatives and friends. Others are puzzled by the fatigue thing and have taken longer to adjust expectations.  I think its ok to give a new person some time to get to know you first, then when you both are keen to see each other more you can explain, maybe a little at a time.  The good ones will happily adapt to enjoy your company.

Hi, I have no idea whether anyone will see this, because I am new on here and trying to understand how it works.  I had a stroke 17 years ago, but only recently started to suffer with anxiety and then depression.  Looking for some new friends for support and happiness 

Gill

Hi Gill - your post will definitely have been spotted by the regular visitors to this site (even though the site is not well designed ?).  You will discover there is a great deal of friendly support and advice through members of the site, and the Stroke Association. There are plenty of amazing stories of survival and life post-stroke, and you are clearly a long-term stroke survivor, which will be very motivating for those who are much earlier on in their recovery.  Take good care, and look out for replies.

? xx  

Hi, (Nic?) and thank you for your reply.  This is a new experience for me, but I think it will be positive and beneficial.  I was in a very strong and positive place back in the summer, so much so that I thought I didn’t need my medication, so I stopped taking them.  Big mistake, my walking in bare feet deteriorated and I became anxious in the shower.  My anxiety escalated to the point where I became depressed.  I am now back on everything and hoping I will start feeling my old self again very soon.

I look forward to making plenty more new friends on here.

Take care

Gill

Hi Gill, you'll definitely make some good contacts on this site.  I don't know much about meds for anxiety/depression or stroke, but I think they do take some time to be effective.  The good thing is that you're taking them again, and hopefully things will soon brighten up for you.  All good wishes xx

hi Gill 

welcome, and we will be very keen to hear your recovery stories, as veteran of 17years. I am four years and counting.  I am sure others will agree that anxiety is a very common experience,   I guess that's not a great comfort, but meant as solidarity   the fact that you are  pushing on after 17years cis testament to your resilience, and encouraging for those like me who think four years is a long time!

 keep posting, we'll find you. wishing you a wonderful Christmas

 all the best 

Tony 

Hi Tony and thank you so much for replying to my message. Yes, 17 years is a very long time and for most of that time I have been independent, positive and happy.  It’s only in recent months that my mood has taken a dive.  But I will fight back and be cheerful Gill again.

I am pleased that I have found this site and by being in touch with other stroke survivors I hope that it will help me bounce back.  

Take care and be strong.

Gill

Hi. Gill.      I'me Ken, would love to communicate.  Regards.   Ken

On line would appear to be how most people meet now, so may be worth a try e harmony claim they match a couple every 14 minutes  I’ve never used them but could be worth a shot I guess all the best, Hugh always remember thatbeingvas a survivor meansyou are Someonespecial