Hi Rups like you at times very confusing days which I am unable to put into words. Feel on a good day it would be cathartic to hear that lovely sound of apples in my scatter mill. & being pressedAfter Stroke did some very reckless things giving away stuff but luckily a little voice told me to hang on to my cider making & moth-trap equipment. Like you a night owl & on a suitable moth trapping night would go out for an hour & come in at2:30/3:30am with containers full of moths at then sit & try to identify them before their release, magic days.Should add I have very tolerant & understanding partner. Sold my bee equipment as could see no way I could beekeep with permanent loss of some vision. Now thinking more positive & can imagine a hive at bottom of garden? No Czech lads brought brandy back every time they went home. Remember hearing on news few years back of illicit still exploding in rented garage in uk killing couple of Eastern Europeans .when I started work @ tender age of 15 on big estate knew a Latvian who made fantastic mead with added botanicals & had still tucked away somewhere making vodka from potatoes but was never allowed to sample that. Hoping you have more Diamond Days this year than dog days. Pds
Hello @Pds, below is a picture of the old extractor we had. I never used it but we still keep it in the garden as a relic.
Iām glad you have kept your cider equipment. You never know when the hwyl will return to press some apples, or even to hire it out to other people. I used to rent my equipment before I had the opportunity to purchase. Thereās an apple and cider community here, so the equipment is Ā£20 for two days, scratter and press.
Every year we get visited by the BSBI, they set up a moth trap and record the species. Itās always an alluring night with the soft light glow of the trap outside.
I donāt see why you couldnāt resume keeping bees, if itās something you found great pleasure in. I have come across articles about beekeepers who have lost full vision, I think for them it comes down to the sound the bees make. I guess you could start with a small hive just for the pleasure of having homed a colony, the only work that may be needed would be checking for Varroa mite, and perhaps feeding them over winter if necessary. Your local bee association will have someone who could catch cast swarm for you to be housed or you could lay a swarm trap and cross your fingers a queen is in want of a home nearby. I donāt know. Itās a gentle art.
I really must make some mead sometime. Maybe I will make some next week as the last of my winter wine. Mead is also referred to as a wine as the fermentation process is pretty much the same. Recovery wise, I have to face my fears this year. I have started what they call auditory biofeedback, itās nothing fancy. At the moment, I am walking around looking down and then up (vocally stating that I am), getting giddy and feeling like I am about to have a TIA, and then doing it all over again. All the while congratulating myself out loud and reaffirming that nothing uninviting is going to occur. Itās immensely disconcerting but itās exposure therapy, and I need to do it. I can do this this when I am outward-looking but as soon as I go through a patch of being introspective, thatās when I crumble. So far, a few reasonably good days but the stinker about cerebellar stroke syndrome is the regression, it just takes you right back to where you started.
Hi Rups hoping sternly talking to yourself helps. You posted that you were doing a mindfulness course would be interested to know more. I find talking out loud but not ranting ( I leave that for indoors) helps me when Iām out walking but try to make sure neighbours not in earshot. List what positives I have, aim at ten. but sometimes struggle! Grim day here rain since dawn but getting a barrow of logs in often moves things along on such days. Having mentioned Ranting, Dylan Thomas poem comes to mind. I amaze myself some days with what surfaces. Was a duffer at school but English Literature has always been there for me.
Morning all from.my lazy bed. Yesterday was a great day I went for a walk with my physio and all went well only a short walk but felt something had been really accomplished when I walked back into the house.
Wish this fatigue would ease and heavy leg would get better but itās only 4 weeks and everyone tells me time.
Anxiety has eased with each passing day about having another Stoke and starting to feel more like me although I really miss the previous carefree me but think heās gone forever and now sensible older me has took his place.
Have a wonderful Saturday everyone. Iām seeing my brother Iāve only seen once in 10 years today. Itās a lonnnnng story.
The forum is real time. Just as a chat. If I am typing and someone else is typing, It tell ls me they are. There is no difference but in name. If I write this at 2:15 am, which it is, anyone looking at the forum will at that time will see my post come up. Instant chat is exactly the same thing,. I suspect this is more about people not being online at the same time then the platform being instant.
Hi Rups, my Mrs told me about this thread. I donāt think she realised the activity here had faded, or even that it took place quite a few months ago.
It seems there was an appetite for an instant chat function.
It would be interesting to know how or why contributions here came to an end. Though it really just burned very bright for a short time then was gone.
The regulars here in this thread still post on the Forum, just never find their way back here.
Looking over this thread I think the appeal was as a place to report ordinary daily activity and thoughts and share this with others.
I think this was very worthwhile and gives a good picture of where we are and how we cope.
I donāt know where Iām going with this, it is just a reply to Rups who posted here just a short while ago.
I am a night owl, sometimes getting up and turning on my laptop for an hour or so before getting back in bed. Sometimes up and down a few times.
Anyway, for now, night night, nos da, see you around.
bob
writing this around 3.30am
Hi Bobi or should I hoot to-wit-a woo. Use to be night owl a good book would keep me up to early hours then enjoyed Moth lamping identifying as many as I could some nights they would flock in so Iād box them and take them home and carry on before releasing them. Have very understanding partner. Since stroke alas now am early bird gone are the days of burning the midnight oil. Have still retained my mothing equipment and live in hope some day I may moth again. But have to take my reading gently and at present only non fiction in small doses. Gave up on the M.Peake book a weird one, and found it exhausting.
Use to post here then lost plot for a while donāt know why ? But Hey Iām back
I get the reading thing. In the weeks after my stroke concentration was what stopped me reading more than 2 or 3 paragraphs at a time. Now up to 5 or 6 pages 
What i did find discover was that audio books and podcasts were great, i still listen most nights in bed. Most libraries have an app (Borrowbox here in Essex) with a decent selection of books for loan, podcasts, well literally millions our there!