Change of personality

My husband had a massive stroke 3 weeks ago. He’s making a wonderful recovery due to the pioneering surgery he had to remove the clot on his brain. However, his personality has drastically changed. He’s so quiet and withdrawn.I know it’s early days but I feel like I’m living with a stranger. I’m working from home to care for him so feel totally isolated. Sorry for moaning, I know I have it better than others but I just feel lost x

@lindashelton welcome Linda to our forum, I’m very sorry your husband has had a stroke. I think our systems close down like a reboot! It’s very early days for him and I’m so glad he’s home with you.

I think give him time and support. But don’t forget about your well-being too. You are not moaning your just reaching out.

There’s a wealth of experience on our forum so ask away with questions, someone will be able to help you or point you in the right direction.

I wish your husband a speedy recovery and best wishes to you both. Kind regards, Loraine :hugs:

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@lindashelton Welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear your husband has had a stroke. It is very early days yet & your husband may be having difficulty taking in everything that’s happened which could be why he’s quiet ,& withdrawn. Brain injuries though impact massively on all different aspects of our bodies & it may be that he needs time to heal & start to get his old self back.
This is a great forum to reach out on so please keep reaching out.
Be kind to yourself too. You have a lot to deal with as well & it will take you time to come to terms with it too.
Good luck with the recovery journey.
Take care
Ann :blush:

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Hi Linda @lindashelton welcome to you, sorry to hear your husband’s had a stroke.

It’s very early days with regards to rehabilitation, his brain is creating new pathways around the damaged area so progress can still be made. That said depending on the area the clot was, there may be personality and emotional changes, read the stroke association article Here.

Your husband may still be in shock, a stroke is quite traumatic experience and can be overwhelming, he may just need a little time to process what has happened.

Remember to take time out for yourself too, every carer needs ‘me time’ to prevent burn out.

Reach out and chat to us, we’re here to offer support wherever and whenever we can.

Wishing you both all the very best. Take care

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Welcome @lindashelton , sorry to hear about your husband but very important (as others said) to make sure you look after yourself as well. Partners & family are often overlooked when people talk about stroke but they often have as tough a time as the survivors. I hope your husband makes a good recovery (still very early).
I’m sure you will find answers to many of your questions here.
All the best.
Mark :robot:

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This is not unusual. I had my stroke six years ago and felt that ‘I’ was no longer in my body. I became quiet, fearful and found conversation difficult. Gradually, I became more myself. Today I am the old me in mind and personality despite my partial disability. I am sometimes more frustrated though and tetchy. Just be as supportive as you obviously are already. Three weeks is no time whatsoever in terms of stroke recovery.

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Thank you for your kind words.

Shwmae @lindashelton, personality changes do occur from injury from the brain, but also after the stroke I had, I was in a fog and constantly sparring with inner anguish and disquiet. This meant I was extremely distracted, and couldn’t focus on what the outside world was doing. Sometimes, I just couldn’t think, and I could not express myself. This would have made me seem withdrawn and quiet to others, but it wasn’t a cognitive change in me, it was just post traumatic stress, a shock so severe I was stunned for months. Over time, I practiced speaking with people, and eventually got the gift of the gab back. Now, I can’t shut up, but sometimes I do withdraw again if I am particularly concerned by what my brain is doing and the symptoms that result from that.


Thank you, that’s really helpful.

I wish you all the best.

Hi Linda when I returned home it took a few months to get use to my familiar surroundings , like Rups and many others here, stunned into silence for few months. I had No interest in TV News or newspapers, music helped . Like you,my wife is still coming to terms with what happened 18 months on. A big chunk of me vanished which is futile to try to explain, But I’m back and adjusting and adapting. And I’m sure your husband will do same, we feel we are getting some normality back , not the chatterbox I was which is a relief to my wife .It’s early days for you when and if problems arise we are the best Agony Aunts (and uncles) your’ll find. Look after yourself chat with family and friends. Welcome. Pds I


Thank you. I’m so glad I joined this forum, you really help.


Sorry to hear this. He’s probably wondering what the hell happened. He will need time to come to terms with it all and adjust, and should start to become more like his old self again. It is a slow process though, so 3 weeks is still early days.
All the best

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Don’t worry too much. I was the same for a few weeks, but my personality came back. I am still learning the new me, and mourning the old me. New me is better more confident to say to things no just don’t want to do. But gained more to succeed. Keep going it’s early days yet

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Hi and welcome. It’s now been a year since my stroke and I have had a bit of a change in personality. I know I’ve become more confrontational, don’t know if it’s the stroke or an age thing and it’s mostly with the medical profession. No longer just sitting there letting them babble on and on trying to blind me with a load of rubbish but really asking about things. So yes some of us do have a slight change in personality I’m also very emotional and cry at the drop of a hat. So I think most of us survivors have slight personality changes but it’s been a traumatic time for us