ok heads up: this is a moan. but also a call for parallel experienceI have had a very heavy cold. first one for a very long time fortunately. so thats not very interesting right? I was just coming up from a fatigue episode. that had lasted a few days. the cold symptoms have had the effect of super charging the fatigue. it is not a normal experience of a cough and sniffle. it is not flu. I do know the difference. but it has flattened me. quite a depressing. it coincides with some ver difficult times at work. where my performance is under scrutiny. so I expect the stress of that has contributed to me getting run down. plus the usual episodic fatigue has resulted in every day feeling like an everest expedition. which reminds me if you want a fascinating long read I recommend Into the Silence by Wade Davis about the first Everest espeditions by George Mallory. hence my reference.
one real bright spot was the once in a lifetime opportunity to see Sir Ian mc kellen in King Lear last week. just before the worst of the cold hit me . commanding performance as you can imagine. was taken by my long suffering family without whom I would be as lost as Lear on the moor.
my aim next time is to post something positive.
meanwhile I hang in there. and just keep on going.
Hi Tony, I have found a cold plus fatigue totally shattering. It has happened a couple of times since my stroke and I just have to go to bed. To have the stress of job performance scrutiny on top of this must be even more debilitating. I am retired, but were I Of an age to work I doubt if I could. Fatigue still hits me every day and I have to have an hour’s bed rest.
But how great to see Lear. I do not think I could manage that. You also have great support from your family, which is so important. Best wishes.
Thanks for the moan. If we dont communicate then we dont learn, so moan away anytime !
Yes a cold will worsen SF. I have just had the lightest, shortest cold . And the SF level rises. Even a slight loss of sleep worsens SF. How you hold a job down I do not know. Good on yu, keep at it.
I have never had any explanation for SF. I doubt if medical science has got any news on that front.So I assume that our damaged brain needs to cope and so it closes us down. If it also has a cold to fight, then I guess it needs to close us down even more.
It’s the time for colds now with the change in the weather and I’ve picked one up from somewhere, not feeling great today. I think it makes SF worse as well. I’m struggling with tinnitus as well which I’ve had since I had the stroke but it seems much louder today.
I’ve noticed since my stroke that I can’t get interested in reading. I used to be an avid reader of books and newspapers but since the stroke I think I’ve lost interest, don’t know if it’s because I can’t remember what I have read the previous night or what the book is about it’s a bit strange.
I’m going to try from tonight to read before I go to sleep like I used to, I started a Jeffrey Archer novel in February and it’s sat on my bedside table since then - will have to start from beginning again. Maybe someone will know the answer to why this has happened.
Im not sure I could have followed King Lear the way I’m feeling. Hope you really enjoyed it.
If it helps my hubby swears by eating a few walnuts every day if he has a cold - it’s the selenium that helps. Worth trying anyway.
thanks for the encouragement. cold is clearing. Work stuff is just horrible. I have to keep going, unfortunately, but I am hoping that things will change. I need the income, small though it is. I have read that necessity drives recovery. Well maybe. it has been the toughest time of my life. I will probably try to negotiate a change in role. as long as I don't sacrifice too much money. I can't take much more of it. family is very understanding. but employer is difficult. I have a senior role in a small charity. it is a very precarious sector. the uncertainty affects everyone, not just me but it impacts on my family greatly as my wife is now chief breadwinner in a job she also is struggling with. she's a secondary school teacher. King Lear was amazing. I am grateful to have the capacity to cope with that outing. a year ago that would have been beyond me. so things change. just slowly. I remind myself where I was a year ago to remind myself to hope.
It is very tough And change is very slow, but it does carry on. I hope you resolve your work issues. As for your wife, teaching is no fun and is now the most difficult of jobs. Keep on fighting on all fronts.
Hi Tony - I'm so sorry that things are so tough for you. SSs have enough to cope with and just don't need these extra layers of difficulty. It wouldn't be unreasonable to think that a charity would be more sympathetic, but as you point out, it's a precarious and competitive. I'm really coming round to Colin's way of thinking that a community should be set up somewhere, exclusively for SS + families, then we could all muck in and support one another. Tony, you could run the library + the Am Dram society, JJM would do the cooking and bed-making, Colin would grow veg and run the bank account, etc, etc It would be non-judgemental, we'd have a brilliant time ?
On a serious note, I hope things improve for you soon, even if you're able to improve in one area it will be a boost. Just know that friendly folks are thinking of you and sending bet wishes xx take care
thanks, really appreciate the kind thoughts I d love to run a library. my house is a bit like one. prior to the stroke I did a lot of DIY work, which mostly consiisted of building bookshelves! stamina for reading is certainly one thing that has improved for me. in the early days I had some cognitive problems with visual processing and would lose my place on the page easily I t has mended itself I am happy to say and I can happily manage 600 pages or more. so I stay hopeful that other things will change. I am thinking of trying to re negotiate my role at work to something less demanding.
it was helpful just to post this up, thank you for reading and responding.
cheers John. the cold is subsiding and I'm beginning to feel a bit stronger. hoping for a better couple of weeks ahead.it was just a bit of a relief to post up my miserable story. thanks for listening and responding
Hi Tony - I'm hugely impressed by the fact that you can manage 600+ pages - that's truly wonderful. Like your wife, I'm a teacher, which means that most of my reading is school related, leaving so little time for reading for pleasure. A few years ago I sold my soul to the dark side, thinned out my precious books and bought a kindle (traitor I hear you cry!!) It has been really useful, as we travel to Italy for the summer in our caravan, taking books was becoming a real issue of space & weight, so it was forced upon me! I'm looking forward to spending my retirement catching up on all the reading opportunities I've missed. So I'd love to visit Tony's Library ?
Take care, hang in there xx