Please tell Dad he must not ever give up. Recovery can be at anytime. Better sooner but still possible later. And recovery is judged in years not weeks. Stroke recovery is agonizingly slow. Different from any other medical issues we are likely to come across.
If Dad wants to give up then he will not recover, It is all down to Dad. Not Mum, not you, not medical staff. Its down to Dad. Your support is helpful but Dad needs to make the effort at his own pace.
Please tell Dad that I got up and walked one morning. Miracles do happen. But its mostly persistence and doing whats needed.
You may wish to have in mind that if Dad comes home he will probably be “dropped” by the NHS like a hot brick. Whilst still in hospital he might get first “dibs”.
Dads legs are not damaged. Its only the messaging system that is bust. His poor brain is overloaded right now and he needs to gently and persistently move his limbs to get his brain in to the right mode
Thats great news that you walked this morning, I have been telling Dad all about you and your amazing progress. When I saw him yesterday he was fab and it was the 1st time that he actually spoke about his stroke, he asked me what happened when he had the stroke and when he 1st went into hospital which I felt was a positive thing. We talked about when he walks again and how I have a 'new Dad' now. I managed to chat to a nurse last night and managed to find out the medication that Dad is on, which was great for me and to know how this will affect him in the future. Still no news from the rehab centres, think I might try and chase next week if I dont hear anything. I'm back seeing him tonight so I'll pass on your comments.
I walked on day 3 of the stroke. Took many months to get away from crutches etc, but the miracle happend on the morning of day 3. Quite extraordinary and quite wonderful. I awoke at about 5am with adrenalinpumping through my body. Five physios attend and that was a huge step forward. We are all different.
I got counselling for post traumatic shock. I never would have thought about that, so well done NHS.
When Dad is discharged it would be good to get a copy of his discharge letter, which will put names to the diagnosis. Dad will find this letter useful in the future, so do try and arrange for him to keep it handy.
Well today the hospital has spoken about Dad coming home and have the early discharge team home to help. They are pushing for this for 12 weeks instead of the normal 6. We now have to discuss with them about the adaptations for the house which will need to happen prior to him coming home. This may include a new bed, cammode, rails and ramps. Dad is happy to be coming home but we are all scared at the prospects of this. I am hopefully going to attend the discharge meeting to enable me to ask lots of questions to help us all get our head round it. Thanks for the heads up about the discharge letter, I'll get a copy.
Sorry to poke my nose in. But I would suggest that you think of a typical day in your dad's new life. From getting up to going back to bed. Think about each aspect how it will be achieved while promoting his independence. For example how will he get out of bed and get to use toilet facilities etc. If you think these issues through before hand it should make his transition from hospital to home seamless.
I have found that preparation now pays dividends.
Wish every luck and good wishes when your father comes home.
Wise words from Kay. I would support the comment about movement. I hope Dad can transfer unaided. If he can then you guys have a good chance, but if he can not transfer you are in a different category altogether. Lifting, hoists and so on.
Assuming he can transfer then my experience of the early discharge team was excellent. I learnt so much. And if its 12 weeks then it is double excellent. But if its six extra weeks in kieu of transfer then that needs another set of consideration.
The grab rails, perching stool, toilet extensioin are sensible short term measures. But commode and new bed suggest a high level of immobility.
Things do look promising.
The discharge letter can be obtained from his GP. If its a case of waiting at the hospital for the letter then I wouldnt wait, I woud see the gP staff a few days later. The hospital may even post a copy to you (well to your Dad).
Yes Dad can transfer from the bed to his chair in the hospital, but we are not sure if his bed at home is going to be suitable, this is something that I will discuss at the discharge meeting. I am going to ask questions about carers (how often they will be in), does someone need to be with Dad all the time, emergency contact, transport, adaptation to the home (funding and timing). Is there any other things that I should be asking that would be helpfull? I'm assumeing they will be telling me everything about his care package etc. Is there are allowances that my Mum can get for being his primary carer? Sarah
Dad will be up everyday, he is at the moment in a wheelchair. On speaking to the hospital today they are sending a hospital bed home, we are sorting a wheelchair and camode. Dad still can not move his arm but is standing now and walking with support a couple of steps. Carers will be in 4 times a day as well as the EDT so lets hope that will ease things for Mum. Looks like he will be home sometime next week. I have a meeting with the OT for more info.
Things sound to be moving forward nicely, and as stroke goes, fast.
We are all different. Not clear why Dad needs a special bed.
Do look after Mum. She must be able to have time for herself. Perhaps a couple of hour a day. Then in a month or two, she needs whole days for herself. I was always keen to get my wife to go out. Right from day 1. And within three months she was having 4 day visits to our family, staying away overnight.
This also helped me because I worked out how to cope on my own. It also let me go at my own pace, which is important for me.
Dad needs a hospital bed because his bed is too low for him to transfer from to a chair. It can also be used in physio as it adjusts up and down. We are going to get the room sorted this morning all ready for when he comes home which after the meeting yesterday looks like the end of the week. We have bought a key safe for my Mum's house so that she does not need to be in all the time when the EDT come. She will find it hard to leave him as she always feels bad when she goes out enjoying herself but Dad is fine about it. I am just planning Chritmas and trying to make sure we have lots to look forward too!
Mum must go out. Dad needs her fit and able so Mum needs to have time away from Dad.
When Dad gets home there is likely to be a downturn in mood, recovery etc. This downturn will soon pass, but it comes as a big shock to many. He may also become alarmed about a second stroke. No logic to this, just our brains shouting at us to not have another attack. Getting home is a further step along the recovery path.
Lots for Mum, Dad and you offspring to learn. SS share many common problems, but no two strokes are the same.
Just thought I would touchbase and see how you are doing, been a while. My Dad has progressed well since he has been home and is now walking with the add of a splint and quad stick. He can still not use his right arm but he keeps trying. Mum is still having carers come in 3 days a week morning and night, she is now having to pay for this. Everything is settling down now tho, the healing diary has been a godsend for all of us.
Thank you for all your help at the begining of this journey, it was invaluable.
Thats so nice to hear from you. I hope Mum is getting some time off.
The diary is indeed a very useful item. I use it more now (39 months) than ever.
Dad is clearly trying and that counts for a lot. Although his limbs were not damaged by stroke, the inactivity will be causing a bit of chaos. So keeping everything moving is a good thing. I dont think like that when I awake with cramp and aches, but I know its the right thing !