Loneliness

Hi I had a stroke In may this year and although I have weakness on my left side and loss of feeling, I can cope with that the biggest problem I am having now is feeling so lonely, I live on my own and my neighbours who seemed nice before don’t bother with me now and friends the same I don’t have much family I just feel like I’ve been deserted by everyone it’s like my stroke is contagious I am normally quite a happy person but I am really struggling with this has anyone else felt the same ?

hi snuffy.

sorry to hear you are feeling so abandoned and lonely post stroke.

also you are fairly new to stroke world. 3 ish months is early on in the journey. how are your communication skills? as in speaking.

have you looked to see if there are any stroke support groups in your area? sometimes for us survivors family and friends can lack some understanding and empathy with our new conditions after stroke.

whereas people that have had a stroke will tend to understand far better. if you get to know a few people on here you will see what I mean.  as I said it's still early days for you, whatever improvements you have made thus far, are very likely to progress further  month on month, even years after. I recall during my first 3 months I could barely string words together, a struggle to recall words, was almost silent during that spell.

things sped up. now I find I can talk too much and too quickly. 

do tell us more of your story. you say left side weakness. do you walk ok?  how does your mind seem/feel? 

il not say welcome to the land of stroke survivors, but welcome to the forum, if you are new here.

I'm sure other stroke people will be along soon here to speak with, share their journeys, advise etc.

apologies if iv asked a lot of questions. 

all the best.

Hi Vinnie thanks for your post, my speech is actually ok I had some slurring when I had my stroke but that has gone now.i have little or no feeling in my left arm and hand and my left leg is a little better, I can walk a little I use a walker but can’t walk far.my leg has improved a little but my hand and arm are still pretty much the same, hopefully with all the excersises things will improve, if I could drive I think that would make a big difference to my mood but I guess it will all come in time. Like you say chatting to other survivors will help as only we know how it feels thanks again. 

Hi Snuffy

I am so sorry to hear you're feeling lonely, as Vinny has suggested, people who have been affected by stroke find help and support from others who have had similar experiences. Local stroke support clubs and groups offer invaluable peer and social support.

Through regular meetings and a programme of activities, they invite people to come together, share experiences, regain confidence, relearn skills, and try out new things. They meet in a variety of places but aim to provide parking facilities and be wheelchair accessible. Stroke support clubs and groups are usually independent and run by volunteers, although many are affiliated to the Stroke Association.

You can find our local stroke club here - https://www.stroke.org.uk/finding-support/support-services

You could always call the stroke helpline and speak to someone who understands the effects of stroke - 0303 3033 100

I hope this helps,

Take care

Vicki 

Hello Snuffy, im in a similar situation, but well over the 2 year mark now. I live alone and work part time from home, and the house now feels like a prison. I posted on the wall and had some excellent responses and I can see the logic in all the reasoning. Im going to try and take all the suggestions on board and try to push the boundaries and make my circle bigger. Only I can do that. Take a look and see if you can also gain some inspiration from their words. All the best.

 

Pete.

Hi Snuffy

I just wondered how you were feeling? Did you manage to find a local stroke group in your area?

Vicki smiley

Hi vicki, yes I did thx I feel better than I did I still feel quite isolated but I think I need to make more of an effort to get out and do things I think we all have our bad days I just think things have caught up with me thx 

Hi Snuffy, 

As Vinnie mentioned, support groups can be helpful. The stroke group organiser for my area is amazing. I have so many things/groups to attend and look forward to because of her.  She is a Stroke Survivor herself so totally understand the support systems needing to be put in place.

I hope you find something that does not isolate you from the outside world. Best wishes!

Haven't been with this group long had my strokes think about 31/2 years think so brain bleed memory goes haywire live on my own and with COVID-19 can't get out as right side still weak, can get around just am trying to get a mobility scooter so can at least get to shop have been trying to get into my community centre but they are only looking out for vulnerable people what am I then this loneliness is really starting to get to me now so I'm with you all.

If you're looking for conversation with other stroke survivors Different Strokes charity have Zoom catch up meetings once a fortnight. Breakout rooms are used so there are small groups of about 5 people so everyone has a chance to talk, if they want to, about anything. 

There are organisations out there that organise men sheds, outings, workshops and meetings, but you may have to do a bit of an online search. In Wales we have Mind and Community Steps. 

Sorry to hear of you loneliness I have encountered it later down the line as things get better people and family forget you are impaired because you are functioning of sorts.
This foru is full of caring sensitive people who in maintaining message contact remind you you are part of a bigger family of SS