Just wanted to chat-Partner (40 years old) had two strokes

Hi Catlin

I'm not in your situation but I thought you'd like a reply. It's a very helpful group so you will get replies soon. It's very early days for you both if you only had strokes over Christmas. How was your stroke? It's hard being on your own and I hope your partner will be well enough to come home soon. It's certainly to early to talk about how your live will be in the future. Take a day at a time. A diary is a good idea as you can look back at how you have made progress. onward and upward as one of our members says. 

Hi! Thank you for your lovely message. It means a lot. He had two right occipital infracts. The docs are baffled to be honest as he has a very healthy background, but these things don't discriminate unfortunately. His balance and coordination and vision have been affected. Seems that there are small positive steps. He is independent apart from his walking which is good. I have read that the brain is a wonderful thing especially as he's young, and that it can take time so I'm trying not to compare day to day, and making sure especially that he doesn't either. It's difficult not being able to see him. One bit of good news is he proposed to me over a video call a week ago, something positive to focus on. Thank you again for your reply x

And I hope you're doing well xxx

Couldnt resist jumping in.

First there are the fabulous stormtroopers. Please can i have one.

then there is my pen friend who had a stroke six months before me. She got married post stroke and a few years on they do seem to be admirably happy. I mention this because stroke can change personality and married couples can struggle to find they have a new partner. My pen friend is already changed so they both know the score.

then being unable to visit. I am not saying this is all good, but your partner really needs rest. I found visiting times horribly stressful. My brain wanted me to close down whilst it repaired itself and visitors stopped the quiet times. the medics will be doing all the checks and tests. And they will not be side tracked by visitors raising queries.

most of us were fit before stroke. If not, then we probably wouldnt survive.

strokes can hit at any age, including babies. No two strokes are the same.

positivity is a vital part of recovery. 
 

look after yourself. He needs you to be fit and strong.

colin

 

Thank you Colin. We will get there. Exactly, positivity really is important. I agree with you about the advantage of no distractions for the staff, a good way to look at it. We are able to video call often so that helps. I hope you're well, thank you again. Catrin :)

Hi Catlin

Sorry I got the wrong end of the stick. I misread your post and thought you had both had one stroke each when in fact your partner had had two strokes. I had a stroke followed by a TIA the next week. We will keep in touch with you and you can let us know of progress. Best wishes Hilary

My partner has recently had a stroke, I feel totally lost :( x

Cherry Blossom, stroke is a terrible event both for the person and their partner. My partner was devastated when I had mine five years ago. He felt distraught and that we had nothing to look forward to. While I battled to recover he joined a carers group, just to have contact with others in a similar situation. He also gave me tough love as I improved, pushing me to do things for myself and to stretch myself. Our live since has improved to the point where I can make a reasonable contribution to our live together. We also enjoy short breaks.

Hopefully your partner will improve and you will feel less devastated. Please consider linking up with any local carers group.

Bless you, we have our wedding to attend in September and he appears spurred on to get better for that :)  Hope you are both well and thank you for the support :)

Positive goals certainly helped me with recovery, small goals first like being able to shower alone, cut your own dinner up holding my new grandson then I wanted to swim with turtles in Barbados which is now another big tick. I have issues with balance and pins and needles, pain in my weak sides joints and on frustrating days do need reminding how far I’ve come and what I’ve achieved 2.5 years on. Those early days of complete exhaustion and refusing help insisting I could do everything myself are in the past my husband regularly gets asked if my personality has changed and he says absolutely not she was bloody minded before :joy: and now I accept his help happily. My stroke was an embolic stroke affecting both sides in several places due to a clot on my metallic heart valve 2 years prior to my stroke I had no idea I had congenital heart disease survived massive heart surgery to get a clot down the line but I’m so happy to be here and looking forward to creating more great memories enjoy your wedding planning it will be something amazing to look forward to and take every day as it comes and write small wins and goals down and tick them off :+1: