Welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear about dad’s stroke and the fact that he wasn’t found for five hours. My stroke was three years ago, when I was 72, and, luckily, I was found immediately. I also lost all feeling on my left side. I had no physio the first 8 days as my stroke happened in Devon and I spent 4 days there before being brought back to Worcestershire, my home county.
Recovery varies from individual to individual and the help and support available depend very much on your local health authority. I spent a month in a local rehab ward where,like dad, the first thing they got me to do was stand, then transfer to a chair. One day, my fingers moved by themselves. My partner was so amazed he asked me to do it again, which I did.
In this early stage, my emotions were shot to pieces. I was like a child. I had to be taught to walk again, to tie my own shoelaces (that took ages) and to wash and shave. I dug deep to do these things and the physio team gave me ‘tough love’, absolutely necessary because self motivation is low and muscles in the elderly waste away quickly.
Now in Worcestershire we are lucky because we have a Community Stroke Team. Before being allowed home, I was taken on a home visit to see what adaptations were needed so I could function safely. The health authority also had a contract with the NHS to pay for these adaptations, So Age UK put in a hand rail and seat in the existing shower, raised existing furniture with casters and put a hand grab at the bottom and top of the stairs. They also put in another hand bannister opposite the existing one and lent me a walking frame for downstairs and one for upstairs, However, until I was taught to climb the stairs, I had to sleep downstairs for three weeks.
For the first month, the Community Team gave me physio at home for an hour every day plus exercises to practise by myself. I had a visit from the Community Nurse and my doctor. Then I had physio Monday to Friday for an hour every day for a month. I was taught how to climb the stairs and how to use the kitchen safely. I also had a bottle so I could pee safely at night. I then had Monday- Friday physio for an hour a day before home support stopped.
After this, I was referred on to hospital for weekly physio and that continued for another 9 months until I reached a good level of proficiency. The time was that long because of my willingness to practise and improve. I then found myself a local exercise class to go to and I now go three times a week. I am not as able as I was, but I do pretty well.
I write at length so you can check whether dad’s health authority offers this level of support. A lot will also depend on dad’s willpower and determination. Encourage him all you can. As survivors, there is a tendency to give up, but persistence pays off. Progress may also be slower than you and dad expect. Please also be aware many of us get post stroke fatigue and need to rest a lot during the day. I still need an hour in bed every day around noon.
Also, please look after yourself. Stroke affects partners and family members. I am lucky that I have a partner at home, but partners need breaks as dealing with survivors can be quite draining. Finally, before I left hospital I was told to expect falls, bumps and bruises. I was also taught how to get up from a fall. I did have falls, not too many, but a big surprise none the less. I also bought kitchen aids to avoid accidents etc.
As I have said and others will add to this, recovery varies from individual to individual. There is little medical support once released back home and Stroke, although a major health concern, is a bit of a Cinderella when it comes to funding. The Stroke Association, though, are marvellous and they will advise on benefits and local support services. You have only to ring their helpline. I wish you and dad all the best.