Feeling a little low today

General
#1

I’m feeling down in the dumps today, a little low… here’s a few of the things on my mind:

Weather - I’m so ready for Spring, I’m tired of being cold.

Covid - Son and family have covid and it’s my granddaughter’s birthday, so I won’t get to see her.

Husband - is not himself, I think he has the winter blues too.

Work - travelling to other offices has raised its head again, I just can’t add the travel time on to the working day, it’s just too much for me to do, I’m ‘done’ by the time I get home from the usual hours. Guess another conversation with my manager is due. It’s as if they’ve completely forgotten I’ve had a stroke. It’s all business as usual for them.

Fatigue - On the face of it, I’ve made fantastic progress, inside my body is a different story. Fatigue is still an issue, though I have to say I’m more resilient than I was initially, is it stroke related or is it I’m simply older and I’m slowing down? My brain doesn’t work quickly when I’m fatigued, words slip out of my grasp and I find myself stopping mid sentence trying to find a word more frequently or I slip in some random word, that bears no resemblance to the word I should be saying. It’s funny, frustrating and sometimes embarrassing (depending on whom I’m having the conversation with)

Fitness - I’m not as fit as I was pre stroke. Finding time, or more accurately, the stamina to exercise now I’m back at work seems impossible, I’m running on empty when I get back from work. It’s frustrating as I know I should do something but my body and mind is too tired.

Optimism - Sometimes it’s difficult to feel optimistic, usually I’m pragmatic about my situation, I’ve had a stroke, I’m fortunate, I survived, the outcome could have been so different. The thing is I believe the outcome I had was because I was relatively fit pre stroke, so it’s concerning that I’m not fit now, what if I had another health issue?

OK, so writing this all down, is taking stock of the situation. I’ll snap out of the funk I’m in today, it’s simply a blip, a bump in the road.

Thanks for reading. Wishing you all a fantastic day. Best wishes

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#2

Yes we all blip blip and this return to winter when Spring was on horizon has put us all in the dumps and other things tumble in to make you feel ratty. Said 100 times before’ All things must pass. To move things along I always count the positives, aim at ten !now it’s what I have to be grateful for ? Boy can I list them and feel my mood lifting. Now going out to put put waste in composter.:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

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#3

Well have you got everything of chest,I hope your feeling better soon,
Lynzy1960

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#4

@Mahoney hi sending you positive thought and a big hug :hugs:.

Work definitely needs sorting or you might burn out. I’m with you in weather roll on spring.

You are always there for us so you are allowed to have your off days as we all do.

Keep going onwards and upwards with positivity x

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#5

@Pds thanks, yes I have a lot to be grateful for, I’ll get cracking with my list :+1:

@lynzy_60 I agree, getting it of one’s chest is a good thing to do :smile:

@Loshy I’ll take that hug, thank you. I’ll have the chat at work, hopefully they’ll understand, if not well, I’ll tackle that issue when it arrives :smile:

Thanks everyone

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#6

Sorry you’re feeling low today @Mahoney. I think we can all relate to it and you’re definitely doing the right thing by identifying the reasons why you feel this way.
Having retired after my stroke I’m full of admiration for you having returned to work. It isn’t easy coping after a stroke even if you have all the time in the world, so you should give yourself a pat on the back for handling everything and holding down a job.
Hope you feel better soon.

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#7

@Mahoney sorry to hear you’re feeling low today. I think everything you describe is a natural reaction to the situation we all fund ourselves in.

What you describe about work is something that I fear when I return in a couple of weeks. Once you’re back they do seem to forget about your illnesses. Do you have a workplace adjustments passport in place? I have got my boss to draft me one & on it I have added no travelling until fatigue jnder control. It may be something to consider? Another occupational health referral may be worth considering too.

Sending you lots of positive thoughts & a big hug. :hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

Take care

Ann xxx

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#8

We all have days when we feel low but we rely on support from others like you. The weather at present is not helping. I always remember my father’s saying which helped him through the war. Trust in God the sun will shine, though dark the clouds tomorrow. Lilian xx

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#9

@Mahoney I’m sorry to read your message today telling us your feeling down in the dumps, maybe today’s a day for curling up on the sofa with a good book or a podcast with a nice cosy blanket. Some distraction therapy, I agree it’s so cold today, I went out a walk earlier and I have not heated since, it’s feet in the basin time with some nice soap. Some aromatherapy oils in a burner or a nice candle burning.might lift your mood and your husbands. A day to spoil yourselves. I hope you feel better soon. In my thoughts @Mahoney. Take care

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#10

likewise what everyone has said. But it is good to get it off your chest.
Onwards and Upwards. Take care.

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#11

hopefully writing helped organise thoughts - i often find that’s 1/2 way to feeling better. Yes ‘business as normal’ is the default mode when people cant see the injury :frowning: youll have to remind them!

A bit of warm sun will help in the mean time a log on the fire or hug a radiator or the other 1/2

:slight_smile:

#12

Thanks @JSCAPM writing it down did help, work is usually ok, though it’s been busier of late and I think I got caught up and powered through instead of taking regular breaks, it probably just got on top of me a little and brought home that I still have to go at a slower pace :smile:

@Mrs5K Hi Ann, no, I don’t have a workplace passport in place but they did make reasonable adjustments. The thing is as I’ve been back for 14 months or so, they forget I have limitations, I’ll have a reminder chat with my manager, from their perspective they probably think all is ok with me as I’m undertaking all the tasks I previously did and I look fine from the outside.

Thanks Lilian @l_platt that’s a nice saying, I’ll remember it from now on, :hugs: big hugs

@jane.cobley thank you for your kind words, yes it’s onwards and upwards :+1:

@SimonInEdinburgh yes, I’ll remind them on Monday and have another chat, thanks

@flo99 I agree, some indulgent pampering can work wonders :+1:thank you for the reminder

Thanks everyone for your kind thoughts and wishes. I’m feeling much better now, had a little trip out and it lifted my mood.

Best wishes

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#13

Hi @Mahoney, I sympathise and can relate to your situation. I feel exactly the same sometimes. I still have regular meetings with a neuro OT that was appointed via my company’s insurance. I do fear what will happen when this support ends in six months or so.

It is very easy for everyone at work to forget that you can’t do what you did before. Almost two years post stroke I’m not ‘fixed’ now (& never will be). Part of the problem is our natural instinct to not over egg symptoms and put a brave face on it. This is a conundrum that I don’t have the answer for.

As I say, I totally understand where you’re coming from as I’m in a similar place.

I’m really sorry you’re feeling down and I certainly don’t want to put any others off returning to work. As I’ve said in other posts I really love the fact that I can still do my job and I get a lot of satisfaction from it but it is (& always will be) a difficult balancing act.

Sorry for the long post.
I hope your discussions with your manager went well and you are feeling a bit better :hugs:.

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#14

Hi Mark @Ingo66 it’s wonderful to hear your firm is providing support for you via a neuro OT :+1:

I too wouldn’t want to discourage anyone from returning to work as I’m generally happy to be able to have returned, we all have off days, even before stroke :smile: it’s an unusual position to be in when one’s employer can’t see what’s going on with their employee, I’m fortunate to be capable to undertake my role and they adjusted my days to allow a rest day midweek, it’s simply the one element of travelling (which adds hours on to the working day) that will pose an issue if they insist I have to do it moving forward.

I’m hopeful they’ll understand.

Best wishes

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#15

@Mahoney, I completely know what you are talking about!
I have returned to work but only part-time (three days). I was originally told that I would not be returning to my job because of the damage caused by the stroke. I am so happy that I can and do work.
My reasonable adjustments sees me working from home. Covid changed the way of working and it actually helped me as once I was ready to start my phased return, I worked from home.
I had support from a Vocational Rehabilitation Team and OT of course.
I had to decide if travelling into work was important or not as my options were, travel into work and do less work or work from home and do more work.
I too can not travel and work. I opted to do more work but from home. I go into work if I need to but that isn’t very often and then I adjust my work to suit the travelling in.
I have to do this in general really. If I am travelling to socialise or an event, I have to factor the before, during and after into my plans.
My fatigue presents itself as being unable to think of words, using random words and stuttering. I laugh it off most of the time but it is frustrating and actually quite upsetting but I am thankful for how I have recovered on the whole.

Fitness too, is an issue. I want to regain my fitness as I use to be an active person but fatigue just does not feel the same way. I am completely the same, concerned that I am no longer as fit as I was and what if another health issue comes along, plus I am unhappy with the way I look!

My optimism varies and I am sure Spring will contribute to that as well!
I will be going on holiday soon for a bit of sunshine. Whilst I know I am lucky to be going on holiday and the sunshine and rest usually helps with my fatigue etc. It is still quite anxiety bound as I never really know for sure how I will manage the travelling and trying not to ruin the holiday for my family!

It does feel better saying it out loud and sharing with those that really do understand. Everyone tries to understand but only those who have been through can really understand.

Thank you @Mahoney for starting the conversation. I did not know I needed to get things of my chest until now! :slightly_smiling_face:

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#16

@Loopyj you’ve made fantastic progress, going back to work following a stroke is more difficult than I imagined, I’m so pleased your employer made adjustments that enabled you to continue working.

Enjoy that upcoming well deserved holiday, a bit of warmth and sunshine always lifts my spirits.

Best wishes, take care

#17

Hope your feeling better today,i too have moments like yours,well days/weeks to be truthful, i keep falling and injuring myself badly just had another 4 months off with torn ligaments and two broken bones in my foot,so i can’t wait to get back to work…have you cosidered going part time or flexi hours if that’s possible?also i wear a lanyard at work with a plastic pass/sign thingy?(can’t remember the word)it says please be patient i am a stroke survivor.or a button badge?i got mine off of etsy, So my colleauges and customers see it everytime i’m there,would that help you maybe?then at least they wouldn’t forget?be kind to yourself slow down and if you don’t feel like doing anything at home dont do it,it will still be there to do another time.sometimes i have a couple of days just crying and down for no apparent reason but i’ve been told it’s aside effect of stroke???either thatvor i’m a menopausal grumpy Mrs.Victoria Meldrew!!!anyway take care of yourself and just remind work your lucky to be back so they should give you some slack… grrrr😉

#18

@BernadetteC ouch that sounds painful, hope you’re recovering well from your fall. I do work part time, 4 days, I never did make it back to full time. It’s enough for me 2 days working, a day off, then 2 days and a weekend off.

Emotions get the better of us all now and then, I can cry at a drop of a hat :joy:

Best wishes, big hugs :hugs:

#19

Thank you.

You take care too.

I hope you can work it out with your employer so you can balance the work/home life thing! :upside_down_face:

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#20

I am feeling Sick too my stomach and Migraine.