Advice

Going to try bus trip local bus but so anxious but need to do this or I’ll never leave house

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Good luck with that! I remember the first time I walked home alone after a stroke meeting to which I’d been driven by my wife. It was rather scary especially crossing the first road and I had to wait till there was no vehicle in sight in either direction before daring to start.
I still do the same after 7 years. I havnt the confidence to challenge moving vehicles.

Deigh

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Hi @Mickyboy, that’s great that you want to venture out, for your first trip I’d say stay local, even if you only go one stop and get another bus back home.

The first trip out alone can be scary, emotional and challenging, well it was for me at any rate, but I felt a great sense of achievement afterwards and it gave me the confidence to go out more.

I’m not sure what after effects you have, if aphasia is one of your issues, you may want to have some information written down such as a telephone number of a family member to show someone, just in case you need assistance to get back home, just as a backup plan.

Enjoy your trip out, this first step will open doors for you, best wishes :slightly_smiling_face:

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Good luck mickyboy, I am sure you will be fine. It is always difficult the 1st time out, but once you have done it you will feel a great sense of achievement. Wishing you well.
Jane.

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Go for it @Mickyboy, I struggled the first time out on my own, I had to rely on focal points, talking to people on the way helps, be brave. We are not as everyone else, we are beacons for survival. Tackle it as a survivor, nothing else matters, it’s our victory.

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I’m so glad to hear you’re doing this. My anxiety and depression got so much better after I began entering the world again. I eased back in with “baby steps”. A little here. A little there. And my life began to change for the better. :slightly_smiling_face: :heart:Jeanne

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@Mickyboy aghhh
wonderful news so glad for you. Make sure you get plenty rest breaks when you need it. Have a great fun day when is it? :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:

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Morning :wave: Try and make it a familiar journey/destination. You are bound to feel anxious but it’s the same for all of us the first time we try something that we used to take for granted. Picture this as a step towards bigger things and what it will open up to you. I haven’t gone anywhere other than on my own two feet yet unless my other half or parents have taken me so this is also on the cards for me. Good travelling! Julia

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Good lucky Mickeyboy. I wouldn’t dare go out alone without a phone in my pocket and then only for a short walk. The first time I was taken out ai was terrified, take your time,Brest when you need to and start to enjoy things. Stroke taught me that life is short. Fortunately, ai travelled a lot when I was younger and have wonderful memories.

Many years ago ai realised that one day I might only have the view from my window. I don’t, but even if that was the case, ai would try and see all ai go from that limited view. There is beauty everywhere.

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Ive only caught the bus once so far and then only to the local shop but it was a success. Am thinking though of getting a lanyard or a cane as althouh I am fortunate in not needing the latter I did appreciate sitting in the disabled seats at the front because my balance is not perfect. I felt rather judged by the other passengers for doing so as I don;t think my disability is obvious.

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Well go for it micky boy even if you only go to the next bus stop remember a journey starts with a thousand steps remember the tortoise and the hare the tortoise gets there in the end good luck

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Still trying to build up the courage to do it, anxiety is a killer bus stop right outside my house and on other side way back. But I just freeze at the thought of doing it, plus have dental appointment end of month and no one to take me, daughter took me wed for a clean up and froze in chair as was expecting pain but none there took care with me which helped my anxiety no end, but keep feeling as I’m going to fall and legs get heavy sometimes I’m an emotional wreck for a man that’s hard was brought up to be stiff upper lip dad was army man and strict

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@Mickyboy, try taking it in small steps, break it down so it’s not so daunting. How about walking to the bus stop and see how you feel, even if that’s all you do, then go back inside.

The next time you may feel you can get on the bus, just one stop, then back home. Hopefully once you’ve managed that you may be able to go further the time after. If you can’t get on the bus, that’s ok, try again the next day.

Anxiety by itself is debilitating, on top of stroke symptoms, it’s takes it to a whole new level.

Have you tried counselling, it can help, talking about it. It’s not easy, I know, but it is possible to manage the symptoms so the effect is not so fearful. Anxiety (as it was explained to me) is your brain’s primal instinct (flight, flight or freeze) kicking in. Try deep breathing or a grounding technique like concentrating on what sounds you hear around you, what you can smell to try to get yourself back to the present moment, rather than the fear.

I appreciate you may have been told (as you were growing up) that men don’t get emotional, but they do, you have feelings and you have every right to feel how you feel.

I’m so sorry to hear you weren’t looked after at the dentist, some people are insensitive to others when they are in need.

Keep trying, you’ll get there.

Best wishes

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@Mickyboy @Mahoney great advice

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I like that Lorraine @Loshy, I’m going to save it. I might even print it and stick it on the fridge as a reminder. :grinning:

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Good luck. It’s all about baby steps (excuse the pun). Set yourself small challenges. Maybe walk the distance between two bus stops? Going outside your comfort zone is daunting at the best of times, but ten times worse after a stroke. Please report back Mickyboy. We’re all right behind you.

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Hi Mahoney,
As usual right on point. There are such lovely people on here.
Amanda

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@Mickyboy i hope you overcome your anxiety so you can get on the bus. As someone else mentioned take it in baby steps. Often I find the thought I’d worse than the reality but it still takes courage to go for it. Let us know how you get on we’re all willing you on.

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Thank you at least I have friends on here mick

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I left hospital Friday 11th March at 7pm booked taxi to take me home stood waiting in rain for 20 minutes itn never came! so had to catch 2 buses to get home managed thankfully :joy:Then had much needed coffee :coffee::grinning: