At 5.50 this evening 2 years ago, our world was turned upside down when I had a stroke. There have been tears, anger, worry, frustration and laughter along the way but we made it through. Last week I achieved 2 more little goals for mankind but massive goals for me. Firstly, I finally conquered peeling potatoes! After two years, my left hand has now learned to turn the potato around when the knife peels with the right hand :) Albeit very slowly, my brain has finally got that message instead of dropping the potato on the floor or just leaving me stood staring at a spud wondering what to do! Secondly, I have managed to clean my lounge window! It's a large square bay window and I have to stand inside the bay to clean them. There are small stained glass sections at the top and sides and large panes at the bottom. To celebrate this, I have new curtains arriving today! We've also booked a weeks holiday which is my first since my stroke. It's in this country as I don't feel ready for going abroad yet but I'm so looking forward to it. So a super exciting week! Seriously though, we all have goals we strive for and it's such a great feeling when you achieve them no matter how large or small.
I have learned so much over the last two years not only about myself but how wonderful the human body is at adapting. I have managed to get the stroke fatigue under control with daily rest. I can now get through the day with 20/25 mins bed rest instead of 45mins. I know my limits so I don't overdo things. I know what makes fatigue worse for me and that's stressing out about things or something upsetting me. Anxiety and stressing is something my brain can't cope with now so I make a concious effort to avoid it if possible.
The great thing about this site is we can all share so much information and we all have different ways of dealing with things that work for us. Everyone of us understands how another stroke survivor feels and how this affects not only them but their partners too. It's been a pleasure sharing this with you all over the last two years and wishing all of you good recovery along the way- Brenda x
Brenda, you have done fantastically well. Your experiences are so similar to mine. It’s silly, I know, but I had exactly the same feeling when I peeled my first potato. My current fetish is picking things up off the floor, from tiny feathers to flower petals. I do this with my good hand, but it’s so good to bend down without falling down. Mind you I did for a small pottery dish with Benecol spread in the other day. It flew from my hand as easy as winking. It was cleaned up instantly and it is another ‘crime’ I have not confessed to.
I am a great believer in holidays and,like you, I stick to this country at the moment. I do what I can, but make my partner walk further or explore shops while I sit on a bench. We are off to a Golden Wedding celebration soon and going by train. We have also booked holidays in September and November. Provided I prepare myself psychological I am fine.
You will have many more improvements to come for sure.
Hi well done u on all you have achived since your stroke. Its a great achivement.
Im struggling this week. Been really tired and didnt want to go to work ( i work in accounts 25 hrs a week) . Im only 37 and had my stroke in oct 2017. I love coming on here because every one understands what you are going through. Im off on hol with my dad at the end of sept ( not looking forwared to flying anymore).
Hi Brenda, it must be the week for achieving goals, large or small, Well done, on your achievements. I was told very early on in my recovery, " celebrate the small things" and "focus on what you can do and not on what you can't". I I am 2 years post stroke have no use of my left hand and arm but have been opening and closing a kitchen drawer, using my good arm to guide the left arm. I do it about 100 times a day and kept thinking " I wonder if I will ever be able to do this just using my weak arm and much to my surprise I can now do it using just my left arm, as long as I get my fingers in the right position on the handle ?. I had a few tears but at least they were happy tears.??
All good - I'm wondering whether you'd be available to clean my windows please, although I might have to join a queue, as I'm sure everyone will be finding you chores!! Seriously, well done for your amazing perseverance against the odds, SSs are a truly inspirational group of people. Keep looking on the bright side, and enjoy your well-earned holiday.
My husband's 2nd 'anniversary' is fast approaching, so I know what it's like to have to re-live those scary hours, gives me shivers to think about it. But, as you say, the human brain/body is a wonderful organism, and you're all here to tell the tale.
Oh Brenda, I was caught out. Yesterday I was asked, ‘Have you seen the butter in the brown pottery dish?’ And I had to confess. I only fibbed about how it happened as I dared not say it flew out of my good hand and shattered on the kitchen floor. I simply claimed to be tidying the fridge and it fell out accidentally. I will not be going to Heaven at this rate!
Ooops! Saw the earlier post JJM, and hoped you'd ducked under the radar ?Could you tell your partner that you've made a donation of kitchen utensils to a charity shop!! If you're doing most of the cooking, statistically you will be the one more likely to have 'accidents', maybe he should spend a week swapping jobs with you, and you can check how many breakages occur!! Then you can declare an amnesty ? Have a lovely w/end xx
I'm coming up to my first anniversary, and it is so daunting as the day gets closer. Reading your wonderful account Brenda, and those of the people who responded, has been so inspiring. Well done to all of you. Mainly though, thank you for sharing your experiences, and I wish you a full and speedy recovery. For those who are talking about going on holidays which involve flying, are you aware of the Sunflower Lanyard scheme? They are 'designed' to make things easier and provide support, both for the carer and the stroke survivor. Sorry, if you already aware of this. - Christine xxxxx ps this is my first message on here, and last week was the first time I felt able to face going into the site.
My partner had a stroke 10 months ago and whilst he remains cheerful and his lovely personality is unchanged he still remains unable to use the arm and leg on his right side. therefore wheelchair or bed bound. I wonder if we will ever leave the house again.
Hi Christine, thank you for the information about the Sunflower Lanyard scheme, I’d not heard of it and am sure there are others on here who would benefit from it.
I’m glad you found this site, we’re all here to support each other and share our experiences be they good or not so good. You will find lots of support on here.
I had a stroke in February 2018 and have some short term memory issues as a result, some days are better than others but slowly, very slowly, things are improving. I’ve found some great support here and you will too.
Never give up. Recovery is best in the first two years, but it certainly goes on long after that. My paralysis was gone very early so I dont know the ins and outs of long term paralysis. There are many others on this site who have had success with various things. You could start with a phone call to the stroke associatioin.
I hope he is getting out of bed each day. He will benefit if he is positive.
And he will benefit if he smiles a lot.
I am so pleased he has not changed personality. I venture to say thats rare and precious. Many of us struggle with big personality changes and the related cognitive issues.
I wonder if he has any movement in either of his right side limbs. The slightest ability to, say, wiggle a toe, will be a good sign. His legs and arms are not damaged, it is "just" the messaging system. His brain will be considering whether or not to tend to those limbs.
One way or another he will leave the house. Gosh I remember the overwhelming emotions on leaving my house. What experiences. I do not for one minute compare to your partner as my paralysis was so short lived, just a few days.
I guess that I always determined that I would manage come what may.
I am now 45 months and still the recovery is coming.
Don’t ever stop working on your recovery, I had my stroke 8 years ago now, no physical issues, all cognitive, but last week I finished reading a whole book, that was such an achievement as I lost my ability to read, I can’t remember what the book was about ha ha, but I did it, keep on trying x
Its so nice to have someone on board who is many years along the recovery trail. I do hope you post a few things from time to time.
My family has the surname Wren and it is suggested that Christopher Wren is an ancestor. There is a christopher wren on the family tree. So I ordered a book about him. Its 500 plus pages !! I doubt he is our ancestor, but its fun to look.
Thank you so much for your encouragement. My partner does have a little movement on his right side but no strength and he also gets a lot of pain. He does get up every day but finds the commode and the wheelchair really uncomfortable. I think we would feel better if we thought things would improve enough for him to regain a little independence. Currently he can't do anything except feed himself with one hand . With everything else he needs help.
Hi! Things will improve but he needs to keep moving. I had my stroke a bit more than two years ago. I can clearly remember when I woke up in the hospital and cannot move my right arm and my right leg. The first thing I promised myself was one day they will move again. I stayed in hospital for 6 weeks and every morning I struggled to eat my toast with my right hand. I can see the toast and I know where my mouth is but my hand cannot find my mouth. I lost my ability to write with my right hand. I cannot even hold a pen. I have drop foot (I still have but it has improved a lot). End of April 2017 stroke turned my life upside down but I chose to fight and keep on moving. EVERY MOVEMENT COUNTS has been and still is my mantra. And now I can walk, albeit I need to use my frame or walker if I need to walk far and do my errands. I can write with my right. I can move my right arm. Its movement is back to almost 100%. I can drive again. It took almost two years for me to be legally allowed to drive again. Things are not perfect. In my case I will never go back to my pre-stroke self but things have definitely improved and continue improving. It is up to your partner to keep moving, no matter how small that movement is. He has to want to improve and work on his own rehabilitation. His family and friends will be around to love and support him but he has to do the work himself. THINGS WILL IMPROVE. The improvements might be only small and slow to happen but they will happen. Best of luck to him and to you.
That little movement is, at this stage, everything.
Keep moving everything he can.Get a wheelchair which is comfortable. Or sit in a chair. But please get out of bed.
Improvement does come. Slowly but for as long as it takes. Your partner must take the lead and do what he can. Your support is highly desirable but the main thing is that he (we) need to help ourselves.
Feeding himself is an excellent plus. Thats a major achievement.
Rubys post says it all. Us SS do understand and we SS are the only ones that can really understand.
